Women protest against the recent rape of a minor girl near Parliament House in Delhi. PTI Photo
A few of my male friends were sitting in a classy café. It was a routine gathering and the hot topic of discussion was the rape of a five-year old in Delhi. They certainly condemned the act. All educated men do that. Two beers down, they became angry about the incident. After 15 minutes of blaming the authorities, our social system and people, they changed the topic. Deep down they were convinced that they were different and stood up for the rights of women. Alas, their great speech of condemn was peppered with swear words that deride women. All that they had done was talk about the incident, like most of us.
Every time there is a rape, we start blaming the authorities, endless analysis emanates from around our dining tables, on Facebook and on long telephonic conversations. But how many of us go and actually protest and be a part of demonstrations? This isn’t a responsibility exclusive to NGOs. Demonstrations can bring change only if they cease to be one time affairs with a few familiar faces. Movements do not become successful by merely showing support, putting the traffic on hold for a few days or placing responsibility on just a few shoulders, like in case of the Lokpal Bill. Big changes require consistency, in one form or another. Here, the civil society, media, law and politicians, all have a role to play. India has a bustling population, but only a fraction come forward to voice their opinions in the open. Who says that it takes time to bring a change? Please do not buy the fact that making a new law takes time. Why can’t there be exceptions for heinous crimes like rape?
Change comes with modifying the little things. Let’s talk about men specifically- the “bitter half” that has been committing the rapes. You might not be a rapist yourself, but you do use those misogynist swear words or sit quietly when you see a woman being harassed. Coming to women, how many stop their friends, sons, boyfriends from using these swear words? How many talk ill about women who are divorced or wear short clothes? How many have participated in those demonstrations? It’s not only about the mentality of men, but also that of the women. When you step out of the office on a dark and deserted street, are you scared? Do you imagine a car coming by and dragging you inside? It’s time to shed the cloak of fear and step up to curb the menace.
So what is the solution? My friend! You have lost the time to act. It’s time to react. Time to show that every action will have an equal and opposite reaction. If scaring the perpetrators with stringent punishments works, so be it! Society has to move beyond the little steps and make some big sweeping transformations. If we do not treat it as an issue of urgent national importance now, we have clearly failed our responsibilities in a so-called progressive society.
